I am too busy for __________? You fill in the blank. These powerful little words hold you back from the doing and being the person you want. What have you been too busy for lately - meditation, exercise, grabbing coffee with a friend or love? I hear it all the time, and I catch myself saying these harmful little words.
The reality is each human in the world has 24 hours in a day. Time, the one true social equalizer in the world. If you have noticed yourself saying, "I am too busy" for relationships, friendships, or family-ships, it is time to do a personal inventory of your wants and needs. As humans, we need and want relationships, even those folks who try their darndest not to let others in. More simply stated, we must have other humans in our lives for happiness and survival.
It is really easy to get wrapped up in social media, the television, texting, online shopping, overtime, worrying, being angry, and commutes. However, no one has ever stated "I am so glad I spent all that time online shopping or watching football" on their deathbed. Ultimately, we get to choose what we want to do with our time. If you are feeling challenged with time lately, try these practices and see what happens.
1. Reflect on the last 48 hours of your life. Review your schedule and events - what did you do with your time?
2. Write down the things that are most important to you. Your family, relationship, work, time with a pet, nature, volunteering, or etc. Then note mentally how much time or energy you spent in them recently.
3. Notice all the things you say Yes and No to. Saying "Yes" can mean actually saying "I can do that" or mindlessly finding yourself in an activity like social media scrolling. Saying "No" can mean actually saying "Thank you but no" or mindlessly finding yourself on the couch instead of taking a walk.
After you try these practices, you will have a better understanding of your time and energy and where it goes. Reflecting on time can be critical in relationships - to build and maintain a relationship it takes time and energy. Only you can decide if you will say Yes to it.
Molly Hillig RN, BSN, MPH
Empower Yourself - Relationship Expert & Coach